Just a few things you should know about me

I am the most indecisive person you will ever meet. I can't make decisions from simple things like what I'm going to cook for dinner, or what colour I'm going to have my hair let alone anything of importance. I often find myself regretting certain decisions I have made because after they have happened( or while they are happening) I realise I should have made the other decision. It's so annoying...but I continue to do it. If life handed me less options I think I'd be stuck standing at that stupid fork in the road less. It's like a choose-your-own-adventure book but I always choose the option that ends in a fiery death instead of the one that leads me to the hidden treasure. Every time the option I choose ends in a sodden tissue tear fest that involves me binge eating and becoming a big fat heffer.

I now know that when I chose which man to love, I chose the wrong one. They were both the wrong one. Now I'm a bitter whore faced bitch. I really like that about myself. I wish I had balls of steel like this a year and a half ago. They would have served me very well.

I don't do things in halves. Ever. (Except washing up)
If I love you I'll give you my last $20 or my kidney. I'll do anything for you, until you do the wrong thing.
There are just some things you have to put everything you have into. Even though I find this screws me over sometimes, I feel I have always given 100% to everything and everyone.

There is only room in my life to despise any one person at any one time. If I find a new person I want to despise, I have to forgive the old one. Otherwise it's too much hard work. Haha. Anybody who knows me really well will know who the top 3 hated/forgiven people have been in the past few years.

When I'm excited or nervous or scared I become irritatingly pitchy... guys, and dogs hate it.

The number one thing that people say about me is that I am 'cute'.

The number one thing I hate people saying about me is that I am 'cute'.

If I need to fight, I fight. If I know theres no point I have no problem walking away. Very few people outside of work have actually seen me angry, and those who have were scared ! Don't MAKE me get my big voice out! Being angry makes me go bright red and shake...it aint pretty.

If I don't say anything you can pretty much guarantee that you're being a spectacular asshole and I'm just trying not to make a big display in public or keeping the peace for the sake of keeping a friendship. This isn't me being gutless, even though you seem to think it is.

I think farts are funny. They always have been and always will be. End of discussion

One of the biggest things I have had to overcome is my fear of failure...unfortunately I do fail at most things, which prevented me from applying to uni...until I did apply and I have failed at that. Once I've failed at it, I have no problem trying it again, which is how I managed to have three boyfriends and how I'll get into nursing. Haha.

My number one fear is being buried in a coffin. My number two fear is Megan Gale- that bitch is scary. Have you seen the godzilla sized posters of her in David Jones? Shudder.

My favourite place in the world is Santorini. I WILL get married there. I don't care who to at this point.

The first boy I ever loved was Nathan Darby and I fell in love with him in the sandpit at preschool. I never said anything. In year 12 I got placed in a class with him at Grafton high and I told him. He said it was a bit late. Haha

I have never said 'I love you' first , but I have always said 'I love you' last.

I am so uncoordinated I scare myself sometimes (and others haha). It's not uncommon for me to punch myself in the head or walk into walls.

When my dad had a heart attack a few years ago my perspective on everything changed.

I believe you never know when you're telling somebody that you love them for the last time. You never know which kiss is going to be the last one. Things turn to shit so quickly, you never really stop to enjoy things when they're happening and then they're gone. Enjoy every minute with the people you love.
Never go to bed on an argument- wise words from my mum.

I'm a big believer in 'everything happens for a reason' and I'm excited to find out the reason... If my mum hadn't moved to Tamworth, she would never have gotten a job at the ANZ bank, and she would never have become best friends with my dad...and they would never have had ME!!! I have met all of the beautiful people in my life because of the decisions that we have all made.

My favourite alchoholic beverage is a long island iced tea, but you can't go past the old scotchy scotch...with diet coke...in a long glass. Get it for me in a short glass and you're just asking for trouble.

I like botox, I've had botox.I'm a massive fan and always will be. Suck it up. Just because I can't move my forehead doesn't mean I can't convey how I'm feeling. I can always reach out and punch you in the face.

I am jealous of my friends who have babies and husbands for the same reasons they are jealous of me for being single.

My favourite colour is aqua or turquoise or whatever they are calling it these days.

If and only if I am seriously intoxicated or seriously upset will I light up a fag.

I have accepted that I am never anybody's first option but one day I hope to be...and at this point in time I'm not willing to settle for anybody less than Mr Perfect with the sun shining out his ass.

I'm not perfect, nor do I aim to be. I aim to be a good person, and I think I do a very good job at it.

I cry a lot. When I'm happy, when I'm sad, when Morgan tried on a wedding dress, the last time I said goodbye to my parents, while watching Home and Away, that time I wanted a pluto pup so desperately and when I bit into it it was a battered sausage(they are NOT the same thing!) sometimes when babies cry at work.....you get the picture.

I'm an old fashioned romantic....it causes me a lot of disappointment. Mr Darcy pretty much has ruined my dating life as we know it because nobody is actually Mr Darcy...

I am my funniest when I'm seriously SERIOUSLY pissed off. Somehow anger fuels my best material.

Don't ever, ever wake me up. Unless the house is on fire, I don't want to know about it.

I might whinge and rant about my family sometimes but I will love them until the day I die. They shit me but they're supposed to. I'm no angel- I give them all the shits too.
I don't appreciate people thinking they can randomly diss my family. They are MINE and only I can rant. They do some fantastic things for me as well, but I'm often so busy being a little bitch that I dont go on about the great things. That's just how I am. I love my parents, I talk to them everyday. If you think that's weird, maybe you should make more of an effort with your own family.

I am the manners Nazi. My children are going to be born saying please and thankyou. I think manners should be a subject at school and are equally important as learning your times tables. People without manners at work constantly irritate me. I have no problem correcting people on their manners- obviously their mothers didn't teach them. Too bad if they're 55.

In the last few years I have become the sort of person who calls back to apologise. I was NEVER that person. But now, I will walk away and realise what a shithead I was and call back. I think I'm really growing in that department.

I believe Tofu is evil. It's just trying to be something it's not. You can't be a meat substitute. It's sneaky too, it rocks up in all sorts of places you don't expect it to be, sometimes camoflauging itself in a chicken dish. Never trust sneaky foods like tofu.

I hate it when people think I'm shallow. I'm not. Maybe when it comes to thinking about myself...but never when it comes to others. I like to look nice for me, not for other people. I don't give a shit about what you're wearing. I just care that you shower sufficiently.

I like pretty things. I'm a girl. I don't like it when people judge me because I bought myself a big arse diamond ring. Why not ?! Why not have a shitload of diamonds if that's what I like ?! Better that I spend it on something worthwhile and not on crack isnt it ? I don't expect people to buy them for me, I would never expect that. So before you judge me and pity the poor bastard who has to buy me a diamond engagement ring consider that maybe the man that I fall in love with might not be able to buy me one. Who the hell cares ?! Maybe he'll buy me a massive one. My life isn't going to be determined by how many carats I get on my third finger. If you think that I think that, then maybe you should reconsider being my friend.

I am fiercely protective of the cds that I love that people pick on me about. Keith Urban didn't do anything to you so quit paying him out. He's a good man, and he has done more for me in a heartbreak crisis than any of you.

I binge eat. There is nothing better to take your mind off feeling like you're going to die than eating twice your body weight in junk food and knowing that you might actually die and that it would make you feel better. Nothing helps you put things into perspective like acid reflux.

I plan to have children. If I don't have a husband, I'll have them anyway. I'm naming my first son Atticus, even though the general consensus is that it's a shitty shitty horrible name. Too bad, so sad.

Oh, and I say what I'm thinking. I generally don't have a brain to mouth filter. Some people find it refreshing, some people don't like to hear the truth.

My dream is to be a midwife, or some sort of nurse. I'm good with people, and I'm compassionate. If you don't think I can do this, how about you keep your opinions to yourself. Hearing I'm going to be a shit nurse doesn't exactly boost my confidence when I've spent a year doing preparation exams and stressing my guts out about getting in to uni. I will do it. And I'll be a great nurse. I'd want me to be my nurse and that's saying something.

You might think I'm boring and lame and that I should go out and shag lots of people and get drunk and 'have a life' but there is nothing wrong with the life I have thanks. I enjoy cooking, reading and baking. It's my outlet. Cooking won't get me pregnant to some douchebag with a low IQ and an imported car with big wheels with a southern cross tattoo, nor will it give me herpes. Cooking does actually keep me company, and if I continue to eat the way I have been, it will keep me warm at night also, especially during the winter.

I am 100% behind body pillows. Body pillows aren't sad. They are pure genius.

I'm a softy. I'll sneak you on the list at work if I think you have a good enough reason, I'll pay for somebody's bus ticket if they don't have anything smaller than a $50, I will walk an old lady to show her where her accountant's office is even if it's out of the way, whatever. But I'm not a pushover. I have had my weak moments and some of my friends have witnessed weak years, lots of tears and more than a few low moments. But let's not remind me of this every time I cry about something. I'm not necessarily losing my shit just because I'm crying over home and away. If I haven't thrown myself off a building by now, I'm not going to. I'm pretty tough you know, but I'm only human.

If you don't like me, or you think I'm a pretentious fake little so and so, or that I'm stupid and I have no idea about things because my opinions on things don't match your opinions then you don't know me at all.

I would do anything for you, but would you do the same for me ?